


Pinky Swear Me This

by tattooeddevil



Category: My Darling Murder
Genre: Gen, Hospitals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-02
Updated: 2012-09-02
Packaged: 2017-11-13 09:43:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/502119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tattooeddevil/pseuds/tattooeddevil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tim freaks out when Jared collapses on stage on night, but why?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pinky Swear Me This

When it happened, it happened nothing like he imagined it would. One moment Jared was singing and bouncing along the stage and the next he collapsed like a rag doll. He always thought fainting came with symptoms ahead of time. You know, dizziness, drowsiness, a headache? Obviously, he can’t ask Jared if he felt any of those things before he fell to the ground like a sack of potatoes, but he showed no sign of any of them.

They’d all stopped playing immediately, always watching each other’s every move closely. He’d been the first one to reach Jared, Andy a close second. The crowd had gone silent before a concerned whisper floated through the venue. Security wasn’t heavy that night, My Darling Murder not a big enough name to warrant more than two people in front of the stage, but both guys had done an excellent job of keeping the people calm. One of them called an ambulance when it seemed like Jared wasn’t waking up. It had been scary.

Jared had been pale, breathing heavily, heart beating so hard it seemed to Tim it would jump out of his chest. He’d tried rousing Jared - calling his name, shaking him, slapping him across the face, pouring water on him - but nothing had worked. The ambulance arrived not long after that, pulling Jared from Tim’s lap and onto a gurney. They’d had all piled into Andy’s beat up truck and followed the ambulance to the Cedars Sinai Medical Center where they were now sitting - or in Tim’s case, pacing - waiting for any news on Jared.

Tim glances at the clock, five minutes later than the last time he looked. Worry is making his heart beat faster, his breathing shallower and he knows he’s on the verge of a panic attack if he doesn’t get himself under control. He jumps when a hand lands on his shoulder.

“Hey man, why don’t you sit down for a minute? You’re wearing a hole in the floor.”

Tim stares at Elias like he’s grown a second head. Elias’ words don’t really penetrate the hysteric haze his mind is in and judging by Elias’ expression, it’s obvious.

“Okay, okay, hang on...”

Elias glances around the ER waiting room until he spots a curtained off area. He steers Tim over to it, gesturing for Andy to follow them. There’s no bed behind the curtain, just a chair which Tim gets pushed in to. Elias forces him to bend his head between his legs.

“Breathe, Tim, deep breaths.”

Tim’s never been more grateful for his friends. They all know him so well, they go back decades, and they know not to ask questions but help him calm down first. While he struggles to get himself under control, he sends a quick thank you up to whomever is up there for sending him his friends. He probably would be lying on the floor hyperventilating now if it weren’t for them. Which reminds him...

“Jared.”

Andy seems to understand and immediately steps out to check for any news. He comes back empty-handed.

“Nothing yet.”

Silence settles over them while Tim calms down until the black spots disappear from his vision and the blood doesn’t rush through his ears like thunder. Tim feels like an asshole, taking the focus like he is, and he’s pretty sure he’s gonna have to explain why he’s reacting so strongly as he is. Elias and Andy know him and he’s not the one to freak out easily. When he thinks he’s not in any danger of fainting himself, he sits up. Elias and Andy are crouched on either side of him, concern and questions etched on their faces. He sighs, here goes nothing.

“‘m sorry, I didn’t mean to freak out like that.”

They both shrug.

“Don’t worry about it, it happens. Wanna tell us why though?”

It’s not a question and Tim knows it. No secrets is what they swore on when they started the band.

“Yeah. I uhm... Me and Jared, we- We’ve been sort of... dating?”

He gets nothing but two raised eyebrows in return, one from each of them. Point taken. When he starts to explain, it’s like the floodgates have opened and he can’t stop himself from spilling the whole damned story.

“It started months ago. Remember that gig at the Martini Ranch? We got so shitfaced afterwards we couldn’t remember where we were staying? Me and Jared lost you guys and ended up in a hotel room downtown. Nothing really happened except for some drunken confessions. Jared told me he’d been having dreams about me. Sex dreams. I told him I wasn’t happy with my girlfriend anymore and that I was thinking of leaving her. That was it, really, nothing else happened. We crashed and woke up with the world’s shittiest hangovers.”

He looks at Andy and Elias, unsure of what to expect in response, but both of them them are just looking at him to go on.

“We both remembered what we said though and things were awkward for a while. I’m sure you’ve noticed, how could you not? Every time I walked into a room, Jared would get up and leave. He couldn’t look me in the eye properly and after a few days I just got fed up. I cornered him and told him to stop being a pussy. He took that to heart and kissed me right there. And I kissed him back. And that’s when... When I realized I didn’t mind. Like, at all.”

Realization dawns on Andy’s face at the same time it does on Elias’s.

“That’s when you broke up with Jen.”

“Yeah. I couldn’t do that to her. Not when I was already having doubts. It wouldn’t be fair. Not to her or me. Or Jared. But then Jared thought I did it for him and read way too much into it and we were back to being awkward again. He had this whole guilt thing going on and it took me weeks to try and explain things to him. In the end, Jen actually was the one to talk to him and convince him we did not break up over him. We hadn’t been solid for months, a year maybe, and Jared was just the one to open my eyes. So, about three weeks ago, I told him I wouldn’t be averse to seeing what would happen and that he should let me know if he wasn’t either. He did and here we are.”

Andy rises to stand and glances around the waiting room for any stray doctors with news, before turning back to Tim.

“That’s not entirely true, though. Between then and now, something happened that made you freak out the way you did.”

Tim’s heart skips a beat when Andy doesn’t sugarcoat and gets right to the root of things. He usually loves Andy for his no bullshit attitude, but right now he would have liked not being on the receiving end of it. But him and Elias are looking at him expectantly and he knows he’s gonna cave eventually, so why not get it over with? He sighs and runs a hand through his hair to sort through the words that will have to express his feelings.

“Last night- Last night we were... We were talking. You know, a sort of let’s-get-it-all-out-in-the-open-before-we-ruin-things kind of talk. The one where you say shit like “it can’t mess with the band”. That’s all good. I may have said the wrong thing during that conversation too though.”

“Like what?”

“Like, I am not gay and will never be gay? I don’t blame him for taking it the wrong way, I shouldn’t have said it and certainly not when we were talking about us together and maybe what would happen in the future, but it sort of... came out and I couldn’t take it back and-”

“And?”

He really doesn’t want to have to say this and he can feel his breath getting stuck in his chest again. He’s going to have another panic attack and he needs to know how Jared is doing, now. Andy picks up on it and rushes to bend Tim’s head again.

“Breathe, Tim, come on man.”

He shakes his head, every fiber in his body suddenly on edge and confronted and scared and he needs to know Jared is going to be okay now.

“Okay, hang on, let me go see if I can find a doctor. Elias, you stay with Tim.”

Tim grabs Elias’ arm and pulls him closer. He has to get his fears out before he loses the ability to string together coherent sentences, he needs to make Elias understand how much Tim needs Jared to be okay.

“I said that- I said that right after we had sex. He- he got so angry and we fought, and- And he stormed out. I couldn’t- He said he loved me but that I- That I was being a coward and that he couldn’t be- Be with a coward. I am- I am a coward because... because I think I love him too! And now I fucked up and- What if I won’t be able to- To tell him that?”

“Well, fuck Tim.”

Elias doesn’t have to say more, Tim knows what the words mean and he’s grateful for Elias understanding. Getting it out calms him down a little, gives him enough peace of mind to force himself to breathe normally and focus. Andy comes back minutes later with a doctor in tow.

“You are mister Woosley’s friends?”

Tim gets up quickly to hold out his hand for the doctor.

“Yes, I am Tim Kelleher, his” - he hesitates - “boyfriend. This is Andy and Elias, his best friends. Is he okay?”

“Well, normally I am not allowed to give this information to anyone other than his family, but since they are not here and he listed you, mister Kelleher, as his emergency contact, I can tell you he is fine and will recover completely with a few days rest.”

Relief floods through Tim’s system and he has to sit down to let it sink in. Jared’s fine, he’s fine.

“What happened, doc?”

The doctor turns to Andy.

“He suffered from a sudden spike in his blood pressure followed by a sudden dip. It’s usually caused by extreme stress or a longer period of emotional pressure. It’s completely harmless, he was never in any real danger. He just needs a lot of rest and a good diet for a few days.”

They all nod and thank the doctor.

“You’re welcome. You can go see him now, he’s in room 23c, right down the hall. He’ll probably be released in an hour or so.”

Tim’s the first to take off to Jared’s room, skidding to a halt to peer in through the window. Jared looks tiny in the stark white hospital bed, hair disheveled and skin pale. Relief makes room for anger and Tim lets it. He storms into the room, startling Jared. It’s easy to grab Jared by his shirt and shake him a little.

“You asshole! Don’t you ever, ever walk out on me like that again, do you hear me?”

Jared chuckles and it does nothing to quell Tim’s anger.

“Don’t you laugh at me! You walked out on me and ignored me all day and then you- You almost die!”

“I didn’t almost die, Tim.”

“Well, I didn’t know that, now did I? I thought-”

“You thought?”

“I thought I’d never get the chance to make it right and- And tell you, I think that I maybe love you too.”

The last words come out mumbled; he’s only ever said it to one other person that wasn’t family before and it’s scary, but he knows they are true. Jared chuckles again and pries Tim’s fingers from his shirt.

“Look at me?”

Tim does and he is met with Jared’s dancing eyes.

“I promise never to walk out on you to die again.”

Tim swallows with a nod and holds out his pinky.

“Pinky swear?”

Jared hooks his pinky around Tim’s.

“Pinky swear.”


End file.
